this weekend was city stages’ 20th anniversary and while the line-up was quite impressive i quickly realized why i do not go every year. hot, sticky frat boys. and not hot as in “hawt”, rather hot as in “would you please get the hell off me, you’re ax body spray deodorant stopped working nine hours ago”. (more…)

three things i love to talk about: farts, pooping and my hair. not in that particular order.
i was tired of having the sweat of death on the back of my neck in this alabama summer. and if the two people who are not from alabama read this, yes it is hot here. hotter than me talking about my bowel movements at a bar. i am sex personified.

my “jesus christ on a stick it is hot out here!” hairdo is courtesy of lisa at orbit salon. hi lisa! she made my head feel twenty pounds lighter and a thousand times cuter. atleast the girl at the stop-n-go said so.

and if by chance my hairdo isn’t your taste, here is a big, fat, squishy kitty. everyone loves thick pussy. now pull your mind out of the gutter.

goodnight my angel face. i love you more than you know. you brought nothing but happiness to our lives. watching you chase down squirrels in the yard, barking at the thunderstorms. hugging us by standing on the bed and bowing your head on our chests. trying to eat cooper and keep her out of trouble. you were not a dog, you were our daughter. (more…)