The Helmet family is preparing a trip to the great state of Colorado. Yes, that Colorado. The one with the fires and the shootings. It’ll be like the wild west, but with less dysentery. The town we are staying in is called Creede. Thankfully, none of these shitheads will be there:
Creede is a historic silver mining town just on the headwaters of the Rio Grande. It is gorgeous, mild and relaxing. At least that is what my Dad tells me. This is the same father I have nicknamed Clark Griswold because every. single. minute. of this trip must be planned. I just want to sit on my ass and look at mountains. Possibly feed a chipmunk or a moose or a chipmoose. I don’t know fauna lives there or how it has mutated.
We’re very excited about this trip. Hanlon has asked every day if it is “plane day”. Bless her heart. I have planned to keep her very entertained while in flight. Once we’re on a layover I expect her to run around like a crazed beast. And that is fine. What do I care if other people are inconvenienced by my child? I’m an asshole like that.
I promise to take lots of photos and spend 3 months not posting them. I aim to please!
Also, do not try to rob my house. We have hired someone to stay at the house full-time. And my dogs are ferocious. Have you ever been licked to death? I DO NOT recommend it!