give me a cd mix for christmas with some truly fantastic music that i haven’t stopped listening to since i opened the case. here is the breakdown of my favorites:

• like U crazy - mates of state. the husband wife duo have more chemistry than ginger and fred and their lyrics are like a wonderful dance through a smoke-filled bar. with piano and drums being their primary instruments it’s easy to get lost in the melodies. it’s simple and altruistic. and one day someone will tell me “i like you crazy” and i’ll melt into their arms. right after i pop a zoloft.
• ragoo - kings of leon. many people don’t know this but i will tell you innernets, because you’re my best friend: i hated kings of leon when i first heard their song “molly’s chambers”. it sounded like steven tyler spent too much time in hunting camp in georgia. in fact, when i went to see one of my favorite bands from nashville, the features, kings of leon were playing with them and made a point to high-tail it out of the bar. but “ragoo” is superb. it hits me in the heart with their line “here’s to the kids out there smoking in the streets/they’re way too young but I’m way too old to preach”. an anthem to knowing it all and not knowing enough.
• carnavas - silversun pickups. word to the wise, don’t read user reviews on itunes. the majority of the comments included comparison to the smashing pumpkins in their gish year. i don’t see it. what i do hear is a song that you want to drive to. drive all the way portland, oregon and start a dive bar. and then it opens up. the song, not the dive bar. the song doesn’t even crescendo, it just explodes. right into your ears and the next thing you know you’re smiling and you’re crossing the idaho/oregon state line.

those are my favorites. there are others that i have listened to incessantly, but not as much as these. i couldn’t have received this cd at a better time too. you could go and download these songs if you were so inclined but i would suggest in going the route i did: have darcia la rosa as your friend.

love you d. you’ve made 2008 a great start.

fun things i did this weekend in no particular order:

• heard a secret about myself. learned that my actions can be misconstrued to portray something very ugly.
• got called out by my best friend. realized that i am a shitty friend and will now make a concerted effort to change that.
• although i drank at a birthday party on saturday i found out my “limit” and promptly went home before i could reek havoc on the birmingham metro area.
• went to a fairly new club called twist n’ shout. performed well by not killing every single asshat in the joint.
• played with minnesota’s iPhone. found myself wanting.
• recorded American Psycho, The Devil Wears Prada, and Fantastic Four on my dvr. watched all three atleast twice.

fun things that i will do this week:

• see harry potter and the order of the phoenix at imax.
• annual ob/gyn appointment. i promise not to make the technician uncomfortable by making galaga jokes.
• attend Rock The Town Red at Bottletree to benefit Birmingham Aids Outreach

good times.

heading to the ATL tomorrow to visit my aunt. while there i will be be lying in the bottom of a closet trying to prove that yes, my family tree has more than three branches. seriously. apparently no one on my dad’s side of the family has drawn out our family tree. they were all too busy drinking and getting electrocuted. seriously seriously.

in honor of my singular drive to the big queasy (as the sweltering air conjures my stomach into a hateful fit of fire) i bring you my play list that i created entitled “Lost City of Atlanta”. yeah i know, not obscure enough.

1. Road To Nowhere - Talking Heads
2. I Drive Alot - Starflyer 59
3. Come Pick Me Up - Ryan Adams
4. Make Me A Chevy - The Promise Ring
5. Blame It On The Tetons - Modest Mouse
6. Last Song On The Blue Tape - Reindeer Section
7. Truckers Atlas - Modest Mouse
8. El Paso - Marty Robbins
9. A Little Respect - Erasure cover by Wheatus
10. Ono Soul - Thurston Moore
11. Lucky Denver Mint - Jimmy Eat World
12. Pensacola - Joleen
13. Lyric - Zwan
14. Psycho Kiler - Talking Heads
15. Scrabble Girl - Joe Christmas
16. New/Improved! - Six Going On Seven
17. The Only Living Boy In New York - Simon & Garfunkel
18. Bartering Lines - Ryan Adams
19. April Fools - Rufus Wainwright
20. Styrofoam Boots - Modest Mouse
21. Portions For Foxes - Rilo Kiley
22. Golden Boys - Res
23. Four Leaf Clover - Old 97’s
24. Police Police Me - Hey Mercedes
25. Sad Sweetheart of the Rodeo - Harvey Danger
26. Watch Me Jumpstart - Guided By Voices
27. Mouthful of Cavities - Blind Melon
28. Hoodoo Voodoo - Billy Bragg & Wilco
29. Stolen Car - Beth Orton
30. All Things Ordinary - The Anniversary
31. Start Choppin’ - Dinosaur Jr.

for those of you playing the home version these songs were picked for their catchy guitar solo and/or for the fact that i can sing the words at the top of my lungs.
i’ll see most of you for the 4th of july. for those i won’t you’ll just have to pretend you’re hanging out with me. or not. i’m not much fun these days.

first, let me say that we are moved in. thank the baby jesus! second, i want to send a shout out to several people who assisted in the easiest move on the planet:

• A Wise Move - thanks to Dave Chapman and his merry band of wheezing movers. if it wasn’t for them i would be lying in my living room floor begging for an ax to chop off my arms and legs. so, if you plan on moving anything at all, please give them a call. if not for the comedic experience of watching a semi-tubby white guy get winded walking down two flights of stairs.
• batonga, kelly, dmoney, and jennybean - you made this move 1,000 times easier and i love each of you so very much.
• ashley, john, and mary - for bringing us the yummiest chicken casserole on the planet and just stopping by to give us “morale” support.
• MIL and FIL - without you two i wouldn’t have the wonderfulest husband ever nor would i have a kick ass drill set!

i will post pictures of our new abode as soon as i can can find my camera. it’s in a box somewhere around here.

things you don’t need to know but will find out anyway because i said so:

• cooper’s birthday was sunday. commence celebration!
• i will spend halloween looking for a house
• jennybean and flip’s wedding was absolutely gorgeous. and someone owes me a $10 bet.
• broken toe + high heels = more lorcets for me!
• i swear i don’t have a problem
• ask me about our low, low prices!
• can you tell that i have nothing of relevance to post about? can you tell that i never post anything relevant?

there. i feel better now.

sarah is so much better than i am. that is why i stole her idea:

Goes like so:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that’s playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don’t lie and try to pretend you’re cool…

Opening Credits:
“Tommy the Cat” by Primus (apprarently this movie is about getting “pussy”. oh god, please stop me!)

Waking Up:

“Situation Gone Bad” by The Features

First Day At School:

“Dance Hall” by Modest Mouse (helicopter noises actually were present on my first day at school. they were investigating a bomb threat.)

Puppy Love:

“My Humps” by Black Eyed Peas (”whatcha gonna do with all that ass, all that ass inside them jeans?”)

Fight Song:

“For Real” by Okkervil River (”some nights i thirst for real blood, for real knives” how appropriate.)

Breaking Up:

“Supernova” by Liz Phair (if i was breaking up with someone i probably wouldn’t tell them that they could “fuck like a volcano”)

Prom:

“Black Cadillacs” by Modest Mouse

Life is Good:

“White & Nerdy” by Weird Al (i get the feeling that this is my husband’s movie soundtrack)

Driving:

“For Once In Your Life” by The Jealous Sound

Flashback:

“Brick” by Ben Folds Five (funny, i was thinking the same thing)

True Love:

“Emergency! Emergency!” by The Promise Ring (”sometimes i wake up early just to tell you goodbye”)

Wedding:

“Last Song On the Blue Tape” by The Reindeer Section (sarah, i think i have you beaten on the emo-est wedding song evah!)

Moment of Triumph:

“Feed The Tree” by Belly (this will be a movie based on 90’s alt-rocker one hit wonders)

Death Scene:

“Alone Down There” by Modest Mouse (i dare you to pick a better song. I DARE YOU!)

Funeral Song:

“Long Distance Drunk” by Modest Mouse (well it is probably how i died)

End Credits:

“Empty Baseball Park” by Whiskeytown

so there. have at it and make fun of the fact that all i have in my ipod is modest mouse.

monday was my birthday and i celebrated by eating BBQ in my pajamas and catching up on missed television. yes, i am that lame. work has me so busy lately that i find myself crashing on the couch the minute i arrive home. this sucks because the husband is losing out and so are the dogs. i am too tired to go romping in the yard with the pups which only increases their hyperactivity in the house. the result is me yelling at them to calm down. i feel so guilty. if anyone can suggest some safe “uppers” i would gladly take them. and no, meth is not an option. well, for right now.

so here is the loot i scored for the birthday:

• the coveted iPod nano - so awesome i can’t function. thanks honeybears!
• $50 bones from mom and dad - more than likely going towards buying accessories for the iPod
• an Entertainment book from mom and dad - my parents’ favorite saying is “hey, do we have a coupon for that?”
• lunch with d-rock and turner at mellow mushroom
• drinks with kel and jeremy and melpel and brit
• not a baby - thanks mrs. hutton, you dashed my dreams of adding one more person born on 10/02 to take over the world! you bitch.
• many birthday wishes far and wide

thanks to everyone.

things i need very soon:

• a manicure
• a vacation
• a haircut
• someone to hand me $5,000
• more sleep
• more blood
• brock’s ear to stop smelling like death
• a drink

i found this little gem on wikihow:

How To Dissuade Yourself From Becoming A Blogger:
1. Find five completely random blogs, and read them daily for a month. After thirty days, you will absolutely dread your self-imposed requirement to read all that dreck. Any blog you create will most likely be on par with what you’ve been reading. Don’t put anyone through that.
2. Consider that your voice, even if it is truly a good one, is a tiny peep against the massive wave of tripe out there. The odds of anyone you don’t already know finding your blog are low.
3. Write on a regular basis in Wordpad instead. If that doesn’t satisfy your urge, and you feel that you must post your blog online, then you might just be craving attention and validation–which you’ll never truly find in a blog. If you give up on your Wordpad journal after about three days, you’ll do the same with a blog that just takes up server space.
4. Ask yourself if you really have the time to commit to a blog. What about that treehouse you wanted to build? Or the book you wanted to write? Or the car you wanted to fix up? Or the restaurant you wanted to take your significant other to? Or the new career you wanted to pursue? Instead of writing about pretty much nothing, or whining about all the things you wish you were doing instead, start doing something that’d actually be worth writing about. And if it’s really worth writing about, you’ll be having too much fun doing it to tear yourself away from it.

apparently the person who wrote this was either a. seriously burned by a blogger on the internet and thusly wrote a seething How To on said internet, or b. attempted to write a blog but was disappointed with the lack of traffic which only confirmed his loser status.

i can handle negative comments on my blog. i don’t like them, but i’m a tough girl and can handle what you say about me. however, what i cannot handle is comments that are a personal attack on my friends. recently a “person”, and i use that term loosely, commented on the attractiveness of my friends. i was appalled at their audacity.

number one: i do not keep the friends i do because of their beauty. that is shallow. every single one of my friends is exceptional and i call them my friends because they love me regardless of the shit i say and do. and i love them regardless of how attractive they are. if you are so concerned with the way my friends look then that is a direct representation of you.

number two: i do not know how many times i have to say this - if you don’t like what is on this website then do not read it. there is no reason to leave nasty comments. it only reflects how black your heart is and how little you have to occupy your time. take up a hobby. i don’t care, just get the fuck off my site. i won’t lose sleep either way.

number three: be careful about what you post on my site. just because it is anonymous to everyone else, it is not to me. i very well might have that one friend who works for the government and can easily find out who you are.